the dillema
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Experienced a great deal of emotional and/or physical abuse and/or neglect.
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Been chronically put down for the way they feel or for what they believe.
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Been emotionally hurt in the past and are not willing to risk getting hurt in the future.
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Had problem relationships in the past where they were belittled, misunderstood, or ignored.
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Experienced the loss of a loved one through death. They can get so caught up in unresolved grief that they are unable to open themselves up to others, fearing they will be left alone again due to death, or, abandonment.
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Experienced a hostile or bitter divorce, separation, or end of a relationship. They may be unable to believe anyone who opens up to them in a new, committed relationship.
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Been reared in or have lived in an environment emotionally and/or physically unpredictable and volatile.
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Experienced a great deal of pain at the hands of another. Even if the other finally recognizes and accepts the responsibility to change such behavior, the person fears that if they let their guard down, the pain and hurt will begin again.
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Low self-esteem and cannot believe that they are deserving of the attention, care, and concern of anyone. They have problems even trusting the positive, healthy, and reinforcing behavior of another who is sincere.
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Experienced a great deal of non-provoked victimization in their lives. They are unwilling to trust people, situations, or institutions for fear of being victimized again.
